Just a Memory Fading Away
by thetwinklingstar
Summary: Daniel makes a mistakes and puts his friends in jeopardy on an off-world mission. He gets his memory tampered with and decides to resign from SGC.
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

**A/N: Well, I finally got this up. The first chapter is in 1st person with Daniel Jackson. This story will switch between his POV/ 3rd person. I hope you will enjoy this story and Read & Review. **

The sun was setting in Cheyenne, Wyoming as I sat there on a park bench contemplating my resignation to the Stargate Command. _'The SGC needs me_,' I thought doubting my decision to leave._ 'No, I know they will replace me with some young scholar_.' I cringed at the thought of some college graduate know-it-all that lacked experience. I shook my head of the idea. But what about my colleagues? I was so close to them...There was Jack O'Neil, Samantha Carter, and Teal'c. I remembered them gingerly, though it was only yesterday that I had decided to leave SGC. I sighed at I looked at the horizon and the sun became just a memory in the evening sky.

"Sir, are you alright?" came a voice that sounded distant. Then almost instantaneously someone was nudging my shoulder. I awoke to see a women hovering above me, staring at me like a fool. I looked around in the darkness. It must have been pretty late because very few cars were passing the park and everyone had left except for the woman and me.

"Yeah, I must have dozed off," I replied. "What time is it?"

She laughed and looked at her watch. "Half past midnight. Why were you sitting out here anyway?" She sat beside me on the bench leaning forwards and staring at me still with her head cocked.

"Well, I was quit my job yesterday and I just was thinking about if I made the right decision," I replied hoping she would just go away leaving me to sort out one of my greatest problems: Where to stay?

"Hmm," was her reply. "What'd they do to you...ya'know for you to quit?" God, this girl was being nosy. i didn't know whether to tell her the truth or not. But if I did she probably wouldn't believe me...

"I worked for this organization called the Stargate Command and my work is very dangerous. I almost got killed on a mission," I said waiting for a laugh to emit from her. She did not laugh, however she just looked at me like I was crazy.

"Um, okay. By the way, do you have a place to stay for the night? You'd be welcome to stay at my apartment with me," she said as she got up from the bench finally breaking her gaze with me.

"Thanks for the offer, but I'm staying in a hotel already," I lied to her as I stood up. She nodded. I started to walk away. I didn't know where a hotel was but I was sure I could find one somewhere. I turned around to look at her. She was still standing there gazing at my figure as I walked into the darkness searching for a hotel.

A walked around for what seemed like hours until a reached a Inn at the edge of the downtown part of the city. It was a brick building that was many stories high. There was a neon green sign in the front, left window that glowed, "Vacant". '_Perfect_,' I thought as I eyed the inn. I pushed open the door and a bell rang alerting the clerk someone was entering. He sat up from his chair behind a counter. He was an old man with balding white hair and a scruffy beard aged with gray and white. He was wearing a black vest with the name "Ed" sewn on the left pocket. "What can I do you for," he asked.

"Is there a room available," I asked the elderly man.

"Indeed there is, mr...mr" his voice trailed off as he put a piece of paper before me.

"Jackson. Daniel Jackson," I said skimming over the paper and signing my signature at the bottom. He took the slip of paper from the counter and turned around. He grabbed a key off a board and slid it across the counter top slowly. His bony hands grasping the key until it was closer to me.

The next day I awoke feeling discontent. My head was pounding and my palms were sweating profusely. I arose from the bed and peered out the window. There was the women from the previous day standing on the sidewalk staring at my window. Her eyes flashed at me. She was a Goa'uld...

**A/N: More to come. Thanks for reading!! Reviewing is encouraged.**


	2. Chapter 2: The Dream

**A/N: Okay, more Stargate finally. It didn't take me that long to write, just I've been busy and working more on my other stories. But, yeah here it is. Enjoy. ;)**

_Daniel Jackson was in a dark room unsure of where he was. All he remembered was leaving Stargate Command with the others to embark on an off world mission through the Stargate. His heart was beating rapidly and his vision was blurred. 'Where am I,' he thought looking around at his surroundings but being unable to register them in his mind. Faintly in the light he could make out a door in front of him and large wooden crates that crowded the room. His friends were no where to be found though. He stumbled in the darkness over to the door, but as he suspected it was locked._

_He cried out, maybe someone would hear him. Maybe, just maybe...Silence filled the air and no one came. Sleep was whispering his name. It seemed like he had been there for hours. He lie on the cold, damp concrete floor and tried to sort through his thoughts. Thoughts of his friends cluttered his mind, if not for him they wouldn't be in this mess. He sighed trying not to think. 'All my fault, all my fault...' He drifted into an uneasy sleep._

_He awoke hours later, someone was at his side. He could smell the familiar scent of Samantha Carter. "Sam," he whispered. "Where are Teal'c and O'Neil?" He was unaware of how he got there, but he did not care any longer. He was just glad that she wasn't dead, and he hoped the others were okay. He was rescued now. He even smiled weakly at her.  
_

_But his elation ended as the door swung open revealing a female Goa'uld. A small device was cradled in her hands that appeared to be a remote control. It was gray and oblong-shaped with a lot of different buttons lighting up as she pressed a combination. Suddenly, it felt like his head was going to explode. Distant memories played as if there was a filmstrip in his head. The pain seared and it made him faint._

_It felt like a train had run over him when he awoke hours later. His stomach lurched and his head swam making him fell slightly dizzy. His throat felt numb and burned as he sputtered a light blue mucus from it. He looked around. He was laying on a bed in some sort of sick bay. But where was he? He did not know. He remembered the Goa'uld attacking him, but was having trouble remembering his life before that. He knew his name but could not remember his life. Who was he besides just a name? He sat up on the bed still feeling rather weak. A lady who had short brunette hair and was wearing a doctor's coat walked over to him. He did not recognize her._

"_Daniel," her soft voice said. "Do you know who I am?" She took his wrist carefully and measured his pulse. He let her, although he wanted to push her away. She seemed to know him, so he figured she was trying to help him, _

"_No, I don't remember you or anything about myself except for my name. I am Daniel Jackson, but it appears you already knew that."_

"_Yes, I did. I'm Dr. __Janet Fraiser. I was afraid that this would have happened. We are working to formulate some solution to your problem at the moment, but hopefully it won't take that long," she replied chiefly._

"_Who's we," Daniel asked her. He definitely knew she was there to help him now, but who were the other people involved? _

"_We at Stargate Command where you are now. Would you like to see a few of you colleagues?"_

"_Yes I would." She left the room and returned not long after with three people. A female, a middle-aged man, and a male Jaffa all wearing military uniforms. The only one he could recall was the female. Her name was Samantha Carter and she had been there with him before the attack from the Goa'uld. He was beginning to recollect his thoughts before what happened. He remembered waking up in the dark room and Sam coming to his rescue. He remembered that he asked about Teal'c and O'Neil. 'That's who the other two people must be,' he thought. Then he remembered what he had been thinking previously before his mind was altered._

"_All my fault, All my fault," he said to them unsure exactly what was his fault._

"_What's you all you fault," asked the middle-aged man curiously. They were all looking at Daniel now._

"_I'm not sure," he said wishing he knew. Maybe his memory would come back to him, no he knew would...It just had to. _

I awoke with a start. I must have fallen back asleep. My head was pounding still. I arose from my bed and poured myself a cold glass of water. I gulped it down trying to clear my head. The memories of what had happened still haunted my dreams vividly. I wish I could forget the whole ordeal with the Goa'uld. Then I recalled the women I had met the night before was a Goa'uld. She looked so familiar though. Was she the one who had altered my memories? I needed to contact Stargate Command, but I just couldn't. After all I quit. I couldn't go back, not now and not ever.


	3. Chapter 3:I Err

**A/N: Another chapter, yay! I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thanks for the support. **

I sat in the dimly-lit room of the inn; my eyes were practically glued open as I stared out the window. I knew I was being paranoid but I tried to convince myself I was doing the right thing by not calling them. They used to be my friends, but ever since I resigned my post at SGC they meant nothing to me._ Nothing, nothing…_The words sounded bitter in my head and I wanted more than anything to persuade them to leave. I tried to concentrate on the view outside the window. It was useless though, night had fallen leaving only the few street lamps to provide light.

_Daniel stared at them trying to remember but his brain appeared to be lodged. Trying to remember what he had done to put them in the position they had just been in on that planet. He had said it was 'all his fault'. He wished he could remember. _

"_I'm sorry," he finally said, "I don't…" His voice trailed off at his friends. Sam put her arm on his shoulder gently. Teal'c bowed his head. Daniel knew that his friends cared about him that they wanted to know about what happened. _

A sharp beeping sound rang through my ears, slightly alarming me. It took me a few seconds to realize that my cell phone was making that noise. I didn't bother to check the number but I flipped it open putting it to my right ear.

"Hullo," I said into the receiver tiredly. "Who is this?"

"It's me, Sam," the voice on the other line said. "Hey, I really need to talk to you. Want to meet for coffee?"

"Um, sure," I replied trying not to sound too desperate. I needed to talk to her, too, or anyone at SGC for that matter. We talked for a few more minutes about the specifics of our meeting and then said our goodbyes.

*****

It was a chilly night. The pale moon shone brightly in the starless sky as I walked along side-walked path to the café. Fall leaves danced gracefully in the wind and I could faintly hear the bustle of nightlife in the distance. The café wasn't a great distance from the inn, in fact it was only about a block or two away, so I arrived earlier than Sam.

It was a rather cozy place with a fireplace, cherry-oak tables, and luxurious leather chairs of various colors. A diversity of flowers sat in the vases that were centering the tables. It was the sort of place that never closes, and there was always people coming at all hours of the day. I often had gone there when I was at SGC. I sighed, it seemed like everything could be traced back to SGC. It was hard to imagine a time when I had not worked there.

Then I brought back to my attention that it was only yesterday I had left. Yesterday that I was sitting on that park bench to the wee hours of the early morning, and yesterday that I had saw her once again. I was confident I would see her again, too. She was after all the whole reason, I was in this mess. She was the one who had made me forget. No, that was my fault. I had said so. I knew why, I had known since the beginning. Then I forgot, but now I know once more. The thoughts were getting jumbled in my head and I could not for the life of me through them all.

_My entire fault…All my fault…_I stared vacantly at the paper menu that lay on the table of the booth where I was sitting. _My entire fault…All my fault... _I knew why, but no one else at SGC seemed to understand. I had walked blindly into the distance, blindly onto the path of danger. I had been deceived into going there, into putting my partners' lives in danger because of me. I had to tell her, so she could tell them. It was my responsibility to do so. I have to. I just have to.


End file.
